Seeing Gaslighting for What It Is

I’ve learned a great deal about gaslighting over the years, and once I understood the patterns, the behaviour of the toxic tenants I dealt with became unmistakable. Their websites — stellareddy.com, rooseveltskerrit.com, districtschoolboardofniagara.com, koryread.com, and even the newer lorriereddy.com — were filled with distortions meant to undermine my credibility and sense of self.

Thankfully, most of those domains have now been deregistered. That alone says a lot.

Understanding Narcissistic Gaslighting

Narcissistic gaslighting is a deliberate form of emotional abuse. It relies on twisting facts, rewriting events, and creating doubt until you question your own reality. Once you see the tactic for what it is, the entire pattern becomes clear.

For a long time, the “excerpt” they wrote about me — claiming I made racist comments — affected me deeply. That was the intention. They wanted me afraid of the consequences of their lies, especially allegations as serious as racism. Their goal was to create a detailed story that looked believable enough to trap me in a “he said/she said” situation.

But they didn’t expect me to have the documentation I did.

Facts Don’t Bend to Someone Else’s Story

What they never knew was that I kept records of where I was every single day in June 2016. When they suddenly invented this supposed restaurant meeting, I was able to prove it never happened.

I submitted my Google location history to the Human Rights Tribunal of Ontario. I even printed my banking records for that month, just in case but didn’t send those. None of it placed me anywhere near that restaurant.

Once that fabricated meeting collapsed, the rest of their allegations lost credibility, too. There were no forged documents. There was no illegal eviction. Their story simply didn’t hold up. They couldn’t even prove they were at this restaurant!

And let’s be honest: if this meeting had truly happened, they would have mentioned it long before 2017 at the Hearing for their eviction. They didn’t — except in general reference in the letter sent August 30, 2016, after receiving a Form-N5. It didn’t appear because it didn’t exist. They created it later, hoping it would stick.

What Gaslighting Does to You

When you’re being gaslighted — especially in legal proceedings — you do everything you can to defend yourself. I gathered every piece of evidence I could find, not because I was guilty, but because I knew the truth would eventually matter.

Nine 1/2 years later, I still know that meeting never happened, no matter how many times they tried to rewrite the story. That’s the thing about gaslighting: once you know who you are and what’s true, their tactics lose their power.

For Anyone Facing a Smear Campaign

If you ever find yourself targeted by a smear campaign, hold on to this: Lies don’t last forever. They unravel with time.

While you wait for that unravelling, learn everything you can about toxic traits and narcissism. That knowledge saved my sanity, and it can save yours, too.

Eventually, you’ll see the lies for what they are — and that clarity becomes a turning point in your recovery.

Excerpts From stellareddy.com That Demonstrate Gaslighting

Below are short, representative lines from the past contents of stellareddy.com, each followed by an explanation of how it reflects gaslighting tactics. I’ve chosen the clearest examples — the ones that show distortion, projection, rewriting of events, and attempts to destabilize my sense of reality.

1. Rewriting Your Identity to Fit Their Narrative

Excerpt:

“Stella Reddy is a liar, racist and a pathetic individual…”

Why this is gaslighting: They repeatedly assign you an identity that contradicts your lived reality, your behaviour, and the legal findings. Gaslighters create a false version of you and insist it is the truth, hoping you will doubt your own character.

2. Claiming to Know Your Intentions Better Than You Do

Excerpt:

“Stella Reddy is willing to deliberately lie… to save her own reputation.”

Why this is gaslighting: They present their assumptions about your motives as facts. Gaslighters often insist they know what you “really meant” or “really intended,” even when it contradicts your actual behaviour.

3. Fabricating Events That Never Happened

Excerpt:

“Stella Reddy called the interracial married couple’s children the racial slur Mulatto…”

Why this is gaslighting: This is a textbook example of inventing an event and repeating it until they hope it becomes accepted as truth. You have documentation proving you were nowhere near the alleged meeting — yet they present this fiction as an undeniable fact.

4. Insisting You Said Things You Never Said

Excerpt:

“Stella Reddy believes in White Privilege and White Power!”

Why this is gaslighting: They attribute beliefs and statements to you that you never expressed. Gaslighters often use extreme language to provoke emotional reactions and force you into defending yourself against things you never did.

5. Projecting Their Behaviour Onto You

Excerpt:

“Stella Reddy is a horrible liar!”

Why this is gaslighting: Projection is a core gaslighting tactic. They accuse you of the very behaviours they themselves are engaging in — lying, distorting, manipulating, and smearing.

6. Repeating Accusations as “Proof”

Excerpt:

“This is not the only time Stella Reddy has shown a dislike for interracial couples…”

Why this is gaslighting: They provide no evidence, only repetition. Gaslighters rely on volume, not truth. If they repeat something enough times, they hope others — and even you — will start to believe it.

7. Claiming Authority Over Your Own Experiences

Excerpt:

“Stella Reddy wants the world to believe she didn’t know what the word Mulatto meant.”

Why this is gaslighting: They dismiss your own explanation of your knowledge, background, and intentions. Gaslighters insist they know your mind better than you do.

8. Using Your Background Against You

Excerpt:

“Stella Reddy claims she cannot be racist because she is from Newfoundland…”

Why this is gaslighting: They twist your words and weaponize your identity. You never claimed that being from Newfoundland made you incapable of racism — but they rewrite your statements to make you sound ignorant or absurd.

9. Creating a False Pattern of Behaviour

Excerpt:

“Stella Reddy has shown a dislike for interracial couples… and given preferential treatment to Caucasian units…”

Why this is gaslighting: They invent a pattern that never existed. Gaslighters often create a “history” of behaviour to justify their accusations, even when no such history exists.

10. Claiming You Are “Playing the Victim”

Excerpt:

“Stella Reddy will always lie, play the victim, and try to gain pity.”

Why this is gaslighting: Calling someone “the real abuser” or “the real manipulator” is a classic gaslighting reversal. When you defend yourself, they frame your defence as proof of guilt.