“Surviving trauma stole a kind of innocence from my mind that I’ll never get back. I can’t unsee how dark people can be, can’t unknow the lengths some will go to hurt others, can’t unfeel the fear that taught me to always be on guard. That part of me is gone for good. It can’t be fixed, only carried.” — Zenda-Lee Williams

Carrying What Can’t Be Fixed

Some experiences split life into before and after. Trauma is one of them. When I read Zenda‑Lee Williams’ words, they landed with a truth many of us know:

“Surviving trauma stole a kind of innocence from my mind that I’ll never get back… It can’t be fixed, only carried.”

Trauma changes how we see people and how we move through the world. I know I was changed after the house fire I had, and even more now after being bullied by toxic people. I see the World differently these days. It teaches us to pay attention in ways we never had to before. It leaves us more cautious, more aware, and sometimes more tired. And yes -something is lost in that shift.

But there’s also a quiet strength that grows in the space where innocence used to be. Carrying what can’t be fixed isn’t a failure. It’s a sign of endurance. It’s the wisdom that comes from surviving what once felt impossible.

We don’t need to pretend everything can be restored. Some things simply become part of who we are. When we carry them with honesty instead of shame, they soften. They stop defining us and start shaping us.

What matters now isn’t who we were before the darkness. It’s who we’re becoming as we walk forward with clearer eyes and a steadier heart.