Happy Friday!

The house is almost done!

I can’t even begin to explain how relieved I am to finally be able to say that. This has been so much harder than I expected, both physically and mentally. The past couple of weeks have been exhausting, and I think I have been running on determination more than anything else.

Today, I am doing the final cleaning, and it feels so strange being in the house now that it is almost empty. Every room looks different. The things that made it a home are gone, and without them, it doesn’t really feel like the same place anymore.

Today will also be my last day there.

Once I walk out the door this afternoon, I won’t be going back. Hubby is meeting someone there next week for the final walk-through and to hand back the key we have. After that, we wait for the final paperwork, and this chapter will finally be finished.

What a strange feeling that is.

A Very Productive — and Emotional — Couple of Weeks

It has certainly been a productive couple of weeks.

We spent the past two weeks sorting through everything, deciding what to keep, what should go to other family members, and what we simply couldn’t save. Last Sunday, we rented a truck and moved out everything we were keeping, along with the things going to family.

Then, on Tuesday, a company came in to remove everything that was left.

They had the entire house cleared out in about three and a half hours.

I stood there watching them work, and I have to admit, it was sad.

It felt like I was watching a lifetime disappear.

Of course, I know that isn’t really what was happening. A person’s life isn’t contained in their furniture, dishes, clothing, jewelry, or all the little things collected over decades. Still, when you are standing in a house watching those belongings being carried out the door, it certainly feels that way.

There was simply no way we could keep everything. We don’t have the space, and neither do other family members. Decisions had to be made, even when they weren’t easy ones.

That has probably been one of the hardest lessons throughout this whole process: you can’t save everything.

The Treasures Hidden Among Everything Else

I have to say, though, my mother-in-law certainly left behind some interesting and unique things!

Going through the house became a bit like a treasure hunt at times because I never knew what I was going to find next.

Among the mess on the floor, I found a vintage 1970s Gucci watch. I also found an older Timex automatic watch and an old Mercury watch. There were quite a few watches altogether, including some that were still sitting in their original packaging.

Then there was the jewelry.

One of my finds was an Akoya pearl bracelet, along with several other pieces that caught my attention. Some of these things had probably been sitting there untouched for years, and I found myself wondering about their history. Where did they come from? When were they bought? Did someone give them to her? Were they worn for a special occasion?

Those are the little stories I wish objects could tell.

And then there were the kitchen gadgets!

I kept quite a few of those because, well, apparently I have difficulty saying no to an interesting kitchen gadget.  I also kept two sewing machines and a few other things that I know I can actually use.

In amongst all the exhausting work, there have been moments of discovery that made the process a little easier.

Closing the Door

Today feels different, though.

There isn’t much left to sort through anymore. There aren’t boxes everywhere waiting for decisions. There isn’t another room full of things waiting for me tomorrow.

Today, I clean.

Then I leave.

I know that when I close that door behind me this afternoon, I will probably feel several things at once — sadness, relief, exhaustion, and maybe even a little disbelief that we actually got through it.

A house can hold decades of someone’s life, but eventually, all those belongings have to be dealt with by the people left behind. Until you actually have to do it yourself, I don’t think you fully understand how emotional that can be.

You aren’t just sorting through things.

You are touching pieces of someone’s life.

Some you keep. Some you pass along. Some you have to let go.

And somewhere in the middle of all that sorting, packing, lifting, cleaning, laughing, remembering, and occasionally wondering why on earth anyone needed so many of these, you slowly say goodbye.

Today, I think, is our final goodbye to the house.

And as sad and strange as that feels, I am ready to close the door and move forward.

The Record Collection

One thing we absolutely could not leave behind was my mother-in-law’s huge record collection.

And when I say huge, I mean huge!

We ended up with seven bags and two boxes filled with LPs, plus another huge box and a bag filled with 45s. There are a lot of records here!

I actually went out and bought a record player so we can listen to them at home. I love the idea that instead of having all these albums packed away in boxes somewhere, we can put one on and actually enjoy the music she collected over the years.

I have already come across a few records that are still sealed in their original plastic, and there are some doubles in the collection as well. We haven’t even come close to sorting through all of them yet, but we already know there are a few that could be worth quite a bit.

That will be another adventure for another day!

Once everything settles down, going through everything we saved is going to become one of my projects. Not just the records, either. There are watches, jewelry, kitchen gadgets, sewing machines and all kinds of interesting things that we brought home.

Right now, some of it is still sitting in boxes and bags waiting for me.

And that’s perfectly fine.

For once, there is no rush.

Now We Get to Rest

The timing couldn’t be better because Hubby is on vacation next week.

Yay!

I think we both desperately need it after everything that has happened over the past couple of months. Between losing his mom, dealing with the estate, getting the paperwork sorted out, emptying the house, moving things, making endless decisions and trying to keep everyday life going at the same time, it has been a lot.

We don’t have any plans for his vacation, and surprisingly, I don’t mind that one bit.

Actually, it sounds pretty wonderful.

I fully intend to take at least a day or two and do absolutely nothing.

No boxes.

No sorting.

No cleaning out houses.

No decisions about what stays and what goes.

Nothing!

Maybe we’ll put one of those old records on the new record player, sit back and just enjoy being home.

That sounds pretty good to me right now.

We Are Doing Okay

Through all of this, I don’t want anyone worrying about us.

We are doing okay.

I am doing okay.

This is a temporary situation in our lives that we have had to deal with to the best of our ability. That’s really all any of us can do when difficult things happen.

Life has a way of putting things in front of us that we never expected to deal with. We don’t always get to choose what happens, when it happens, or how much gets piled onto us at once.

We do get to decide how we move through it.

Sometimes that means taking things one day at a time. Sometimes it means doing what needs to be done even when you are physically and mentally exhausted. And sometimes it means recognizing when you’ve reached the other side and finally permitting yourself to stop.

To rest.

To breathe.

To do absolutely nothing for a couple of days without feeling guilty about it.

I can tell you one thing for certain: I learned a lot from this experience.

I learned about responsibility. I learned about letting go. I learned that possessions can carry memories without actually being the memories. I learned how difficult it is to make decisions about someone else’s belongings when they are no longer here to make those decisions themselves.

And I learned, once again, that life changes whether we are ready for it or not.

We deal with what is in front of us. We do the best we can with what we have. We keep the things that matter, let go of the things we can’t carry with us, and eventually we move forward.

For now, though?

I think we’ve earned a little rest.

And maybe a few old records playing in the background while we do absolutely nothing.

That sounds like a pretty good plan to me.