Stella Reddy's Story of Hope

Poster: You Never Knew About Narcissism By Mark Smith

What’s crazy is how you never even knew what
a narcissist was. You never knew anything about
red flags, boundaries, manipulation, or what
gaslighting even meant; until that one person …

I no longer feel ashamed for not recognizing the toxic dynamics that unfolded in my last workplace. Back then, I didn’t have the language, the tools, or the awareness to identify what was happening. I didn’t know what narcissistic behaviour looked like. I had no concept of red flags, emotional boundaries, manipulation tactics, or the insidious nature of gaslighting.

It wasn’t until I encountered that one person — the one tenant who created a nightmare in the workplace for me — that I began to learn. And while the experience was painful, it cracked open a door to self-awareness and healing that I didn’t even know I needed. So, I thank them for that as I am in a way better place now!

The quote in this poster above hit me hard. Those words stir something deep in me. They remind me of how far I’ve come. I used to resent that I didn’t see it sooner, that I allowed myself to be mistreated. But now I realize: ignorance isn’t weakness. It’s simply a starting point. And growth begins the moment we choose to learn. I will never regret my education over the past few years, and I know there is way more left to learn!

So today, I honour my past self — the one who didn’t know, but who kept showing up anyway. And I celebrate the version of me now, who sees clearly, sets boundaries, and refuses to shrink in the face of toxicity.

If you’ve ever felt blindsided by someone’s behaviour, or questioned your own reality because of how you were treated, you’re not alone. And you’re not broken. You’re learning, just like I was. And that learning is your power.