When Shame Outweights Integrity

“If a person’s shame outweighs their integrity, they will continue to do shameful things, and continue to increase their shame and decrease their integrity. If a person chooses integrity even in the face of shame, they will feel better. Their shame will lessen. They will continue to make choices out of integrity and their shame will continue to diminish.” By Doe Zantamata

I have found this poster to be a guiding light, leading me along the path I needed to follow. For some time, the toxic shame I experienced overshadowed my integrity, causing me to react in kind to those who were treating me poorly by publicly criticizing them on a website I created. Despite my efforts to defend myself, I found that I still wasn’t feeling any relief.

It wasn’t until I took the time to reflect on my own values and integrity that I truly understood why. I recognized that my actions, in publicly shaming others for their behaviour, were not in line with who I am as a person. By removing their names and ceasing to engage with their negative content, I finally began to experience a sense of inner peace.

I came to realize that their hurtful words were merely assumptions, not truths to be believed. They were acquaintances, not true friends who truly knew me. By prioritizing my integrity and staying true to myself, I started to feel a sense of liberation. No longer did I struggle with conflicting thoughts, I simply followed my own moral compass and values.

The more I trusted my instincts, based on the extensive knowledge of human behaviour I received over the past 8 years, the more empowered I became. Now, I sit here in awe of the human spirit and how resilience and inner strength can help improve our lives if we allow it.

I am content now with what I do and how I choose to live my life and no I have no need to be afraid, as I know I will survive.

7 thoughts on “When Shame Outweights Integrity

  1. Yes, so true. Sometimes you’re shamed into doing things but end up feeling awful. You’d rather choose integrity.

    1. Thanks Pooja! 💐
      Yes, I find it is better to be feel comfortable with yourself, you are the one living your life.
      When I first created this site almost 3 years ago, so many people had their own opinions over it, mostly negative of course, as they were afraid I would write about them. They have come to see that I write my story, theirs is their own to tell, so most have learned to ignore my site. I understand why they feel the way they do, but it wasn’t their choice to make.
      I choose to follow my own instincts and I am grateful I did. Writing on this site has helped me release all the angst and heal from it all. I am thankful I followed my own path.

      1. Thanks Pooja. I am glad too. We all deserve our own voice, no one else has the right to speak for us, or to shut us up. As you said, if someone doesn’t agree with what you have to say, they can move on and ignore it.

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