Stella Reddy: Target of Narcissistic Traits

The picture has become much clearer to me now that I have been removed from the toxic environment for the past few years. It is truly astonishing the extent of the abuse I endured, a realization that only came after I escaped that detrimental environment. Here in NL, I have created a safe haven for myself where I have complete control over who enters.

I now have the power to choose who I engage with and who gets a glimpse into the life I have built for myself.

Once my body had the chance to relax from the constant hyper-vigilance and overwhelming fear, I was able to see the behaviours and actions with much greater clarity. I devoted myself to studying narcissism, triangulation, gaslighting, and various other subjects to gain insight into what I had been enduring. I delved into smear campaigns, analyzing websites and their content to find parallels with my experience. I even sought guidance from psychological articles and continuously attended counselling sessions. These efforts have become part of my daily routine.

Through the creation of this website, I have also established a sanctuary for myself. By openly sharing my story of intense bullying at the hands of tenants in a property where I lived and worked, my sense of safety has been greatly heightened. Despite the presence of my bullies’ malicious opinions and implications online, I take solace in knowing that my truth also exists within these spaces. Whether or not it is being seen by others is of little consequence to me, but rather, the fact that it exists is what matters most. When one searches for you will also find my site, a testament to my story’s presence is apparent. That is all I need.

Such extreme fear can become all-consuming, leaving no room for anything else to penetrate. I recall reading countless blogs from 2018 until the time I departed in 2020, yet most of them failed to register with me. Only in the past year have I been able to truly absorb the meaning behind the words I have been reading.

It is now clear to me that my cognitive functions were disrupted while enduring this ordeal. Fear engulfed my life, consuming my every thought. I lived in constant terror, both of the vile words and images online and the potential anger-motivated mobs that may come after me because of them. The truth or falsehood of the allegations was of no consequence; their mere existence stirred people against me, regardless of their illogical nature.

Though the internet grants accessibility to all these domains brimming with my degradation, I find solace in the fact that nobody knows my current whereabouts. My address is not plastered on this domain, complete with a map pointing directly to me, and the pictures they possess are now over seven years old. Should I receive any nasty emails or messages from anyone, I have the power to block them, ensuring they never bother me again. On the internet, it is remarkably easy to control who has access to me.

I do not fear encounters with anyone in public due to the Adult Tenant Bullies sites. The thought of being attacked here is the furthest thing from my mind. Nor am I concerned with being questioned by those sites. The job I was offered here in the past put all those fears to rest, proving that some people residing here have encountered those sites and harboured no interest or concern about them. Most individuals I have met do not even bother looking at them, as they simply do not care. I am reassured that these sites have become history, with no relevance to the present.

Indeed, as a previous commenter suggested, the sheer contempt shown toward me within the online content of those websites speaks volumes. I felt invisible, ignored, and wholly misunderstood. Disrespect was heaped upon me, and I was forced to endure mistreatment from everyone. I was expected to remain silent and bear it all, while these Adult Tenant Bullies pursued legal action, involving Divisional Court in the appeal of their eviction and Human Rights applications that spanned from November 2017 to January 2020, when they chose to ignore the HRTO hearing. To endure such degradation for such an extended period was an unbearable burden.

It was not until I distanced myself from the situation and began to feel genuinely safe that I could discern the true dynamics of what the Adult Tenant Bullies had done. This sense of safety was exactly what I needed and longed for.

Through my journey of self-education, I have come to understand that while the physical space where one resides can contribute to a feeling of safety, the majority of it stems from within oneself. I have created a safe space in my physical environment and with the story I have shared online on this site.

Returning to NL, my childhood home and a place where I feel immensely comfortable provides me with the reassurance and safety I so desperately craved. Being surrounded by the Atlantic Ocean on an island adds an extra layer of comfort, shielding me from the Adult Tenant Bullies. However, the most crucial space where I needed to cultivate a sense of fearlessness was within my mind – and now, I have achieved that.

The fear has dissipated like a wisp of smoke. These days, I feel empowered and confident that I will overcome any obstacles thrown my way. As I reflect upon my life, I am astounded by the myriad challenges I have faced and successfully navigated, emerging as a stronger, better person each time. There has never been a circumstance that has permanently defeated me; I always find a way to bounce back.

Even in the face of adversity, such as the incident where I broke my ankle in two places last year and recently underwent more surgery to remove nasty lesions, I have managed to rise above and thrive rather than succumb. I remain resolute in my conviction that I will conquer it all and stand tall once more.

No matter what curveballs life may throw at me, I am equipped to handle them, as that is simply what I do. If I have trouble, I ask for help. I will always find a way forward.

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