Stella Reddy & Power of Positivity!

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Stella Reddy & Power of Positivity!

For as long as I can remember, I was always a positive person and was always able to find something worthwhile in my life. I am a optimist! It as a habit I got into long ago, to follow any negative thought or action with a positive one. To give you an example of this, I am very sore and hard to move first thing in the morning when I wake up, BUT I wake up! Sure, I am sore and my joints are stiff in the morning but at least I wake up and am still here! I wake up every morning grateful to still wake up and still able to move and be independent. I am sure when I end up in that wheelchair, I will still feel the same. As long as I can wake up and function in some manner, I am happy and content.

Life is too precious for me to let go of yet. I have more to do, more to see, more people to meet. Blame the house fire I had in 1991 for that strong will to live, as once it came to me what I survived, it just made me want to live even more. I learned I died that day, due to my lungs and the smoke damage, the loss of blood I had, but they revived me. My first clear recollection was waking up in ICU, hooked up to a ventilator, and not being able to talk or move, with my Mom standing there looking so relieved. I still have the little red hardcover book she brought to me to write in, as I couldn’t talk for about 2 months. I wrote everything in that book, even all my conversations with the social worker over my kids. 

I survived all that and learned to manage to live with it, I am sure I can learn to manage this time too. Sure, it’s hard and I wish I didn’t need to manage issues caused by someone else’s actions against me, but I know I can survive. It will be 31 years next month since that day that changed my life so much. I survived that, I can survive anything!

I focus on the positives, and the very fact that I thrived in spite of the many mobility issues I had the past 31 yrs, I am sure I can manage to get through whatever life wants to throw at me. 

Life is Short

Life is to short to not survive whatever it wants to give you, good or bad. How you manage, depends on your mindset.

Since the extensive therapy I had after the fire for my PTSD, I learned a lot of techniques to help me get through all the negative self-talk I had. I wanted to live, I fought very hard to get my independence back and look after myself and my family but it was hard adjusting to the changes my mobility issues gave me. These techniques have been very helpful for me with this situation and I am so grateful for that. I learned then to follow a negative thought with a positive one, and though some days it was hard to find anything positive in it, I did, as I am still here. 

I always knew this situation was temporary, that even all those domains were temporary, and that eventually the truth would become clear to all.

I said this from the beginning, as I knew in my heart that I did nothing they claim I did. Even when I was bombarded every day from so many people to “stay quiet” and not give them more fuel to use, I knew it would eventually run its course, as all things do. I was just very impatient and upset over the process, as I was losing myself to all the pressure I was under, not just from these Tenant Bullies but also from the owners and even some of my own family. I heard “let it go” so often, I now have the saying on a magnet on my fridge!

I appreciate that my bullies took everything I said and twisted it around, at the time I didn’t care, as I wanted the truth out there. That is a big positive out of all the crazy-making that was going on, as now it is all being used to show the various traits like gaslighting, triangulation, and outright lies being told. The responses from these tenant bullies over my words and actions show their severe Bullying of me very clearly. I wouldn’t have any of it if I didn’t respond in some way! 

Learning to accept what is from what you want it to be, is hard but can be done, when you want it bad enough. In the beginning I was stressed over my reputation, but I learned that nothing could tarnish all the good we did in the properties we worked in, even that one. I was embarrassed by my Bullies spreading rumours about me to all he came into contact with, even strangers, and all the name calling he did of me, but I came to understand it was all projection, trying to put the focus on me and what he claims I did though he never ever had any evidence of it. 

I got angry when I found out he went to my previous property we lived, and worked, in and spoke to the staff there about us, and they were given personal info they had no business doing. They lost their job for doing that, rightfully so, as I contacted the management. These tenant bullies went out of their way to talk about me to anyone and everyone and they didn’t care that I heard them or found out about it. In the end, I came to accept it was out of their own shame and embarrassment, trying to put all the focus on me so they can hide what they did. They wanted me on the spot so you wouldn’t see them and what they do. 

I went about educating myself, not just on Narcissism, Bullies, and Smear Campaigns but also on mindset, mindfulness, and coping skills, and HOPE. I have been going through Trauma therapy, figuring out what I need to work on in myself to become a better person, and to manage life’s challenges better. I’ve learned about Ego and how it holds you back, so I let mine go these days. 

I do the work on my mental health that I need to feel positive, hopeful, and grateful for my life and all I have in it. I spend time, every day, reminding myself of all the good I have, and it makes me feel good. 

I look at how far I have come, not just over this nasty situation, but everything I accomplished in my life and I am thankful, period. My life is mine, no one else’s. I faced my many challenges that were specific to me, to the best of my ability with what I knew at the time. It’s all anyone can do. 

The past is what it is and cannot be changed. I did what I did and I accept it all and have learned from it. I learned my mistakes, learned a lot about myself and what I want for my future too! 

I am in a way better place, physically and mentally,and it will only keep getting better every day. 

Life goes on! 

 

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