I have come to terms with the fact that I was bullied not because of any fault of my own, but because my tenants felt insecure and humiliated after being held accountable for breaking rules and getting evicted.
Their behaviour was childish, displaying a lack of maturity and emotional significance. It served as an outer reflection of the turmoil they were enduring within themselves, revealing deep-seated internal struggles that were influencing their actions.
The immaturity and recklessness they exhibited were a clear manifestation of the unresolved conflicts and issues they carried. Their inability to handle situations with poise or thoughtfulness indicated a lack of emotional growth and the presence of unresolved pain or insecurity.
In many ways, their actions were a cry for help, a desperate attempt to mask their inner turmoil behind a facade of immaturity and carelessness. This behaviour clearly suggested that they were grappling with personal challenges that were impacting their ability to navigate life maturely and responsibly.
These days, I feel pity for them. It must be incredibly sad and frustrating to spend so much time focusing on other people’s lives instead of their own. How can they focus on their own personal growth or their children’s futures when they are consumed by jealousy and negativity toward others?
Adult bullying is toxic and destructive in any environment, whether it’s in school or the workplace. Narcissistic adult bullies choose to degrade others because they lack empathy and are afraid of facing consequences. Their self-esteem issues drive them to constantly bring others down.
People who truly love themselves don’t need to tear others down to feel superior. Narcissists often try to prove their worth by flaunting their possessions, careers, or the accomplishments of their children. But their mistreatment of others ultimately reveals their own insecurities.
Adult bullies often use their words to belittle and harm others. It’s important not to underestimate the impact of verbal bullying, even though it may not leave physical scars. Extensive research has shown the damaging effects of persistent bullying on mental health, and I am a testament to that. Their gaslighting and mistreatment deeply affected my psyche, but with time, I have recovered.
I now understand that bullies are not truly strong individuals. They may seem powerful on the surface, but they have significant weaknesses that drive them to bully. In the case of these tenant bullies, their weakness lies in the shame and regret they feel for causing their own family to be evicted and for the hardships these actions caused. They wasted so much time and caused unnecessary pain.
Toxic adult bullies have no concern for other people’s feelings or the damage they cause. When the time came for the final hearing with HRTO, they walked away out of cowardice because they knew they would lose and be held accountable for their actions.
In the beginning, they were confident that accusations of racism would be accepted, solely based on their word. They arrogantly believed that their claims of bias against the adjudicator and I would be believed simply because they were an interracial couple. However, they didn’t anticipate that their own words would be their downfall.
The truth is, that the Landlord and Tenant Board do not care about personal feelings or prejudices. They only care about ensuring that necessary work is completed promptly. They have rules in place for apartment entry to protect the rights of both tenants and landlords. It is not about personal preferences, it is about professionalism.
All I see is someone wasting their life sitting behind a computer, trying to make baseless accusations against others. Words are powerful, and they can cause irreparable damage to reputations, careers, and self-worth. Many adult bullies spread rumours and gossip, using words to hurt and demean others. The good thing though is that with time, these bullies are ignored for what they do.
Their actions and behaviours, caught on the internet, reveal more about their character than mine. It’s essential to remember that the way we are treated reflects more on the other person than ourselves. Bullies often have personal unresolved issues that need their attention. They should focus on themselves instead of hurting others.
Toxic adult bullies should reflect on why they feel the need to bring others down to elevate themselves. They should question their motives and confront their own insecurities, rather than picking on others and what they do.
It’s important not to let a tenant bully make you doubt yourself or question your own worth. While that may be their ultimate goal, they can only succeed if you allow them to.
I made the mistake of succumbing to the pressure for a time, but I learned a lesson. It’s crucial to stay strong, know who you are, and take the necessary steps to protect yourself against bullying. Document everything, seek support, and make use of available resources.
These steps can help boost your self-esteem and build your confidence. Stopping an adult bully from hurting you and others is a significant achievement that can change your life. While I don’t expect these adult bullies to learn from this experience, I have taken steps to protect myself. They may continue their malicious actions, as evidenced by their recent online activity, but I am no longer affected. You have no idea how grateful I am for that fact!
I have become more cautious and less trusting of people, but the past 3 years of being home in NL have helped me heal. I have let go of the shame that this experience placed on me because I now understand that I am not to blame for their bullying. Adult Tenants who Bully make their own choices.
I am responsible for myself, not anyone else.