Narcissists Retaliate

My happiness is determined by how I feel about myself, deep down.  I have made serious mistakes in the past and will make tons of mistakes going forward, it is a part of life. People (including loved ones) get mad at me all the time and I am okay with that. I have emotional regulation once again.

One thing I know, I will never accept the definition of who I am, from a person who’s hiding the truth of who they are. KR & AR never admit to their actions outright and will never have the honesty to do so. The evidence of their retaliation is contained in the many false narratives they have on their own websites I share here.

I deal with the stuff of life out there every day. None of it impacts how I feel about myself anymore. I no longer allow myself to go down the rabbit hole of self-hatred and self-pity. I imagine myself having impenetrable armour around my heart and toxic people will no longer get through. Besides, why would I accept advice from people who obviously do not have a clue about me and my life?

I apologize for my mistakes, I make amends, and when necessary, I listen with compassion when people are mad at me. I strive every day to be better than I was the day before, and always, I never stop learning. I am grateful for my life, and it makes what I have, and where I am, enough. I have found contentment once again! I live in awe of the beauty I see every day around me!

Through the excruciating pain of a lifetime, I know that everything is already okay, I will always be okay! I am still here and that says a lot about my resilience. At 57, I am the very happiest I have ever been in my life. And nothing can change that, not anymore.

Writing out my Story of the Toxic Narcissistic abuse I endured the past few years, has helped me release it from my system. I am healing the trauma of being Bullied by Adults from my last place of employment, just as I healed from the trauma of a house fire all those years ago.

The more I learn about the tactics I have been shown by Toxic Tenants who have narcissistic traits the more I free my mind from its nasty effects and the more I am determined to expose those actions. I am determined that one day, I will see Justice for all their Targets for all they have done on the internet with Bullying and Smear Campaigns.

The article I am sharing below from Psychology Today will show you the tactics in play from Toxic Adult Bullies I had as Tenants, as they too used HRTO as a weapon in which to try and control their targets.

One such tactic I have seen is how Toxic Tenants weaponize the Social Justice Network Of Ontario and its Human Rights Tribunal in their Bullying ways. They use “filing an HRTO complaint” as a weapon against you. The threat of a legal process they will drag you through is their way of trying to control your actions. Evidence of this threat is clearly online in the content of their many websites as copied below! I also share the email I got on June 27, 2022, filled with the open threat they sent me!

KR & AR used their applications with HRTO, since they filed on June 4, 2018, as a weapon against me to Bully me more. It was a way for them to play on my Mental Health and the fears they knew I was having, as they used their emails to HRTO to traumatize me with more threats of “exposing” my personal life to the general public. Their “exposure” of me and all they gained during the process is very clearly contained in their many sites that have my name.

KR & AR took all the very personal information they got during all their legal processes and used it against me in posts on their websites of stellareddy.com, 859kennedyroad.com, davidstrshin.com, and sjtomemberkevinlundy.com.

As it says “The primary motive of those who abuse laws and procedures is to disempower and silence victims—to make them feel afraid, alienated, and ashamed.” The process of HRTO I endured was used as a tactic against me to get me to “shut up”, but as you can see from the posts I have on my own site, that didn’t always work.

I was quiet while I still worked for the property owners, as their pressure worked on me then, but once I quit on July 4, 2018, my voice became more vocal, as I felt they no longer had any right to tell me to “stay quiet”. I started responding to HRTO, maybe not always in the right way, but I didn’t care. I was tired of feeling beaten down and was determined to pick up for myself.

I refused to remain quiet, as I knew they were lying. I felt it was my job to point out the lies they were telling about me and my character in their missives to HRTO and in the contents of their websites containing my name. I still do that and have added the contents of the new domains they made against other Targets they found for themselves, as the strategies and tactics are the same for all. I have a right to my voice, just as much as they do!

I have no problem with any person writing on the internet, just don’t make your posts about someone else, it isn’t your Story to tell!

It is true, I have seen that with time and education, you eventually pick up on the patterns Adult Bullies show you and it does come with a price. My price is the list of Topics on stellareddy.com filled with more evidence of the many tactics they use. It was also in davidstrashin.com, 859kennedyroad.com, sjtomemberkevinlundy.com, and socialjusticetribunalsontario.ca.

Nothing enraged Toxic Adult Bullies more than me speaking up for myself against the many false allegations they made online on their sites and in person on the property and it caused them to assassinate my character in very vindictive ways. The evidence of that is also contained in the missives on their websites!!

Nothing enrages a narcissist more than you cutting through their lies, and no one will assassinate your character more than someone afraid you will reveal how they have no intention of ever listening or growing.

Fortunately, many victims eventually pick up on the narcissist’s patterns. But even this comes at a price: The more control narcissists lose over you, the more vindictive they become.

One great benefit from Adult Bullies using SJTO in their Bullying of others is that it won’t take long for the members of these Tribunals to see what they are doing and use their powers to put a stop to the procedural abuse. These Adult Bullies have a history of filing claims and abandoning them afterwards, wasting the Member’s time. All their claims are listed below.

As a result of actions like that, the SJTO has a provision in their procedures where they can determine whether an applicant is being vexatious in filing and can make strict rules that they need to follow in order for an application to be accepted on their behalf. I can see that happening here with KR & AR in any future applications with the Human Rights Tribunal of Ontario.

All they need to do is search for their personal names and they will find all the previous filings they did and the results. This is why I believe these threats of filing with HRTO against anyone else, is an EMPTY ONE! As these Applicants didn’t follow proper procedure the last time, there is no way they will allow them o do it again to someone else!

By the way, the Petitions are up again, for the 6th time!! They keep removing the Petitions they have on Change.org, and re-posting them, looking for a different result than what they previously got. It won’t change, as they show with their words in their petitions, why they did this action and that is why it won’t get anywhere.

2023-03-14Read v. The Deputy Minister of the Treasury Board Secretariat, 2023 HRTO 348 (CanLII)
2023-03-07Read v. Jones, 2023 HRTO 304 (CanLII)
2021-10-14Read v. Jones, 2021 HRTO 901 (CanLII)
2019-12-19Read v. Social Justice Tribunals of Ontario, 2019 HRTO 1636 (CanLII)
2019-12-13Read v. Social Justice Tribunals of Ontario, 2019 HRTO 1613 (CanLII)
2019-12-13Read v. Social Justice Tribunals of Ontario, 2019 HRTO 1611 (CanLII)
2019-12-13Read v. Social Justice Tribunals of Ontario, 2019 HRTO 1609 (CanLII)
2019-12-12Read v. Social Justice Tribunals of Ontario, 2019 HRTO 1607 (CanLII)
2019-12-12Read v. Social Justice Tribunals of Ontario, 2019 HRTO 1605 (CanLII)
2019-12-12Read v. Social Justice Tribunals of Ontario, 2019 HRTO 1602 (CanLII)
2019-03-08ER v. Liscio, 2019 HRTO 415 (CanLII)
2020-01-22ER v. Liscio, 2020 HRTO 73 (CanLII)
https://www.canlii.org/

From: k
Sent: June 27, 2022 7:41 PM
To: sredd4848@gmail.com
Subject: YOU HAVE BNEEN WARNED!!!

If you bad mouth my children’s website and continue to try and destroy their ambition and ability to make some money this summer. I will be filing another human rights application against you. You are still clearly obsessed with the hatred belief that Black people are getting ahead of you.

LEAVE MY FUCKING CHILDREN OUT OF YOUR Racist games!!!

YOU BETTER FUCKING UNDERSTAND IT!

They have done nothing to you, and the only reason you would try and bring them down is because they are biracial and from bi racial couple! You have been warned!!!

We are currently putting together our documentation to submit to the Human Rights Tribunal of Ontario (HRTO), and we will be releasing all of it on this website to let the school’s parents and the general public knows what is happening.

We will publish everything that was said, done, and written by all parties involved because we no longer feel that we should be ashamed or embarrassed for bringing up this kind of behavior in our public schools. This conduct only persists because the people who are affected by it are scared that it will have an impact on their children and their education.

We will do whatever it takes to not only to expose and destroy their lies and racist behavior by making these individuals accountable. But to make sure they understand and they know it was our family that did it!

Let the cards start falling where they may!

https://connaughtpublicschool.com/

Five ways narcissists weaponize punitive institutional policies and protocols.

KEY POINTS

  • Legal abuse consists of covert, institutionalized tactics of power and control, and weaponizes policy and protocol in retaliatory ways.
  • Embellished child abuse reports, fabricated petitions for involuntary commitment, or threats of deportation are all examples of legal abuse.
  • Motives for weaponizing punitive institutional policies and protocols mirror the driving forces of narcissistic abuse.

Legal abuse—sometimes referred to as abusive litigation, abuse of process or procedural abuse, or malicious use of process—consists of covert, institutionalized tactics of power and control.

Common examples of legal abuse include:

  • Making false reports to Child Protective Services (e.g., claiming you are an unfit parent).
  • Starting or threatening to start custody battles.
  • Threatening to contact immigration services to control you.
  • Filing protection orders randomly or when no contact has been long-standing.
  • Filing petitions for involuntary commitment to mental health facilities.
  • Using discovery requests to share embarrassing or irrelevant things about you.
  • Filing appeals to reopen and re-litigate settled cases.

This form of psychological abuse weaponizes policy and protocol in retaliatory ways and can play out in courtrooms, human resources offices, immigration detention centers, mental health hospitals, and student disciplinary boards. The primary motive of those who abuse laws and procedures is to disempower and silence victims—to make them feel afraid, alienated, and ashamed.

Moreover, the formal and authoritative nature of investigatory proceedings can pressure victims to doubt whether they are actually innocent, a form of self-gaslighting that serves the abuser or manipulator.

While the #FreeBritney movement represents a high-profile instance of retaliatory legal abuse, similar cases oppress everyday people every day—bullied students who defend themselves, co-parents, co-workers, foster kids, forcibly hospitalized inpatients who refuse psychiatric medication, street pharmacists and vendors, tent-dwellers and LGBTQ+ homeless youth caught out past curfew, undocumented immigrants, and more.

Why Do Narcissists Retaliate?

Clear signs of narcissism are selective empathy, resistance to perspective-taking, and willful ignorance in response to constructive criticism or well-intentioned feedback, often to the point of self-sabotage.

For some narcissists, these traits are rooted in insecure attachment during early childhood—which often leads to insecurity and low self-worth—whereas, for others, impenetrable defensiveness results from being overvalued as a child, not being abused or neglected.

Either way, narcissists tend to act entitled to respect that must be earned, then maintained. And whether they are “faking til they make it” or genuinely believe they are God’s greatest gift to humankind, narcissists tend to think they deserve to associate with people they deem accomplished and esteemed.

In fact, a hallmark trait of narcissism is kissing up, kicking down—gravitating toward influential people who make them feel special by proxy while speaking to and treating subordinates and/or peers like trash. While ample literature exists on narcissists preying upon empathic martyrs, note that narcissists also actively seek out people who have power in their own right.

And this is where the trouble begins.

A narcissist needs to feel they are always doing better than others and, conversely, that others are always doing worse. Yet, they gravitate toward confident, talented people who are prone to make them feel insecure or outshined. This can trigger one of two responses: covert narcissism which, over time, subtly erodes a target’s self-worth and detracts from their credibility and reputation, or outright one-upmanship and power plays.

The latter response typically occurs when the narcissist pushes a victim to the limit and they dare to speak up instead of being pushed over the edge. Narcissists want cheerleaders, not friends (which is they become masterminds at getting others to open up without reciprocating vulnerability themselves). When a cheerleader steps out of line to assert self-respect or set a boundary, the narcissist feels genuinely annoyed and insulted, even betrayed

Narcissists are more concerned with losing you as a source of narcissistic supply than listening, so they tune you out, shift the focus back to your faults, and deflect. Common tactics include DARVO defensiveness (deny, attack, reverse victim and offender), shapeshifting excuses or rationalizations, blame-shifting and finger-pointing (e.g., “…but what about how you...”), toxic amnesia and gaslighting (e.g., “That never happened,” “I never said that,” “Your forgetfulness is scary,” “You’re delusional”), or minimization (“You’re so sensitive,” “It was just a joke,” “You’re such a drama queen”).

Fortunately, many victims eventually pick up on the narcissist’s patterns. But even this comes at a price: The more control narcissists lose over you, the more vindictive they become.

Nothing enrages a narcissist more than you cutting through their lies, and no one will assassinate your character more than someone afraid you will reveal how they have no intention of ever listening or growing.

The Narcissist’s Plot

The narcissistic abuser can deploy an array of accountability-dodging tactics. While survivors of narcissistic abuse often validate these schemes and maneuvers for one another’s healing, rarely are they contextualized to institutional policies and protocol. Following are 5 ways narcissists weaponize punitive institutional policies and protocols—investigations, penalties, and sanctions—also known as retaliatory legal and procedural abuse.

Gang stalking and surveilling. Narcissists often keep as many tabs as possible on victims to outmaneuver them, especially when they are prone to legal abuse. They often set victims up to divulge information to “flying monkeys,” allies who pretend to be neutral but report back to the narcissist. If flying monkeys are unavailable, a narcissist might resort to surveillance via invasion of privacy (e.g., checking the victim’s browser history, text messages, medicine cabinet, etc.).

Lying by omission. Narcissists are notorious for leaving out their contributions to conflicts—for example, resisting their restriction of your body movement turns into you attacking them. Screaming out of frustration—in response to them mocking and cursing at you—turns into your “blowing up for no reason.” Filed reports aimed at legal/procedural abuse almost always contain these distortions.

Pathologizing. One of the most common tactics of narcissistic abuse is portraying a victim’s character or temperament as always and only angry, hypersensitive, lazy, or irresponsible. Unsurprisingly, narcissists employ this tactic to initiate or substantiate legal/procedural abuse or malicious use of process. Pathologizing victims garners sympathy for the narcissist while “othering” or stigmatizing the victim.

Stonewalling. Narcissists are known for giving the silent treatment—for weeks, months, sometimes years—because they know it can pressure victims to doubt themselves or compromise on their boundaries and non-negotiables. For narcissists prone to legal/procedural abuse, the silent treatment is also a trap that sets you up to face allegations of harassment if you reach out first, let alone follow up.

Weaponizing professionalism and respectability, while playing dirty. Narcissists are the calmest liars. You will be amazed by their ability to pretend to not know of the harm you are describing. In professional spaces—a space prime for procedural abuse, in response to workplace bullying allegations—this act often looks like weaponizing professionalism against you as you express your shock and disbelief in any way that is less than perfectly cool, calm, and collected.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/beyond-cultural-competence/202304/how-narcissists-retaliate-via-procedural-and-legal-abuse

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