Writing your way to happiness… such an apt statement. For the past year, I have been writing my way to my own personal happiness. With every post, I release so much from my mind and spirit, over all this mess. I am so much calmer over it all…
I came to terms with my fears created by these domains being online, I have no reason to fear anyone or anything, it is all in my own mind. My fears came from my anxieties about what could happen and were exacerbated by the news at the time. I am safe, I will always be safe. These Tenant Bullies can’t do anything to me and never will!
Adult Tenant Bullies lied about allegations of racism, just because they are an interracial couple/tenants. They took 2 1/2 months to come up with this lie of racism and a prior meeting in 2016, as in all that time, not a word was said about this alleged meeting, not during any interaction of paying rent in cash, not in any email of refusal of entry, nothing till Aug 31, 2016, AFTER they got a Form N5. This meeting never happened and their actions prove that!
The facts are that If they were able to prove I am a racist person and I discriminated against them, IN MY JOB, they would not have walked away from the process as they did. That action showed everyone, that they were lying.
I freed myself from the mental torment of this personal attack on this domain in my name online. I worked it out in my mind, with my writing, on here and elsewhere. I am okay, and will always be okay. I am free of this now, for good.
The email this Bully sent me a couple of days ago, even though it was short, showed me so much. I am finally mentally free. Their words have absolutely no effect on me anymore, except laughter at their empty threats. They are finally no one and nothing in my mind.
I found this article a while back and have been working on these things for myself, to get rid of my self-consciousness that came about from the spotlight of this smear campaign and websites online.
I have been practicing mindfulness for over a year now, and it has been very beneficial for me. I don’t get stuck in my head anymore and the rollercoaster has completely stopped! Remuneration is no longer something I get stuck in anymore.
2. Cultivate mindfulness. In some ways, mindfulness might just be the opposite of self-consciousness. It involves staying present in the moment (vs. getting stuck in your head) and accepting situations and emotions as they are (vs. worrying about them or trying to control them). You can build your mindfulness skills by practicing mindfulness exercises—things like noticing the details of an object or doing mindful meditations.
I live my life in gratitude these days, I feel it, I write it, and I share it out loud with all I speak to! I show my appreciation to everyone in my life, even to our cat, Hope. Strangers on the street even, get a smile and good morning/good afternoon and what a beautiful day it is, weatherwise. It takes me a few minutes to walk around my backyard, as I stop to appreciate the many flowers growing there and how green everything has become.
Yes, gratitude for what you have, for all the wonderful things around you, the people who show you every day how much you mean to them, do cause a significant shift in your thinking and how you feel about yourself and the life you have.
I have changed my outlook and point of view, by accepting my own part in all this and letting it all go, into the past where it belongs. This is my history. It is over, never to be resurrected ever again. The history of the past 6 years cannot be changed, BUT, I can change what I do from this moment on.
Time to get away from all the negativity and spend living in complete peace. No Adult Tenant Bullies, no more thinking about them nor writing about them. I get to test my newfound knowledge and determination to let this all go and focus totally on myself and my own life. Time to enjoy what I have accomplished!
With this site and my journal writing, I have written my way to my own happiness!
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/recover-girl/202206/writing-your-way-happiness
KEY POINTS
- Your perspective can change in a matter of weeks if you journal about these 9 essential elements.
- There are three forms of gratitude: feeling it, writing it, and sharing it out loud; sharing it makes your happiness spike.
- Journaling about emotional discomfort forces you to see the part you play in your resentments.
- Brainstorming new ideas triggers dopamine and makes us feel like we’re accomplishing something.
Finding Your Focus
I had learned through recovery that my perspective, when it comes to resentment, is often out of whack. When I resent someone, my ego often steps in to convince me I’m right and the other person is wrong, no matter the facts.
My point of view tends to be equally skewed when it comes to fear: my defense mechanisms often prevent me from even seeing when I’m afraid. Fear, I realized after journaling about it for some time, often registers for me as depression or loneliness, or even fatigue.
Journaling about my emotional discomfort forces me to see the part I play in my resentments and also gives me the space to acknowledge that a lot of my discomfort is fear.
Gratitude is Key
We all know that it’s important to feel grateful and that gratitude lists are a wonderful way to instill the feeling. But just how much of a difference it can make is significant.
According to coach Tony Child, the author of VisionShift, there are three forms of gratitude: feeling it, writing it, and sharing it out loud. “Your gratitude spikes 42 percent when you share it,” he explains.
While I don’t always get to the point where I’m sharing my gratitude out loud, I do try to write five things I’m grateful for every night.
Jeff Kober, a meditation teacher and the author of Embracing Bliss: 108 Daily Meditations, has an annual ritual where he invites people over on New Year’s Eve and has them write a list of 108 things that they’re grateful for. “Gratitude is one of the shortcuts to bliss,” he says.
The Importance of Self-Care
One of the most obvious and yet overlooked activities that helps people feel their best is self-care, which is why I ask myself every night what self-care I practiced that day. As a result, I not only get to experience the benefits of self-care but also see how I can switch it up.
Many of my students responded similarly. “I meditate daily but I desperately need a self-care that’s more physical and there were several evenings I found myself going for a walk because I knew I had to answer that question,” says meditation teacher and author Jenna Tighe. “The question helped me be more mindful of what is really needed.”
“Self-care is often the first thing to go when people are busy or stressed,” says my journal consultant, Josh Lichtman. “Whenever a patient tells me they feel off and aren’t sure why, my first question is, ‘Have you been exercising?’ The answer is often, ‘No.’ Knowing that you’re going to be tracking your self-care in a journal makes you so much more likely to be accountable and actually do it.”
It’s crucial to know, however, what self-care is to you. I read that Oprah says she practices self-care by spending Sundays lounging around in her pajamas. I’d go out of my skin if someone told me I had to spend Sundays in my pajamas, since my form of self-care is more along the lines of going out for a hike or seeing friends. So, as the saying goes, you do you.
And then write about it in your journal.
Setting Goals, Recognizing Progress and Faith
Goal setting, progress, and faith are three other elements we focus on in the evening journal.
Since we know that tracking our progress helps us achieve our goals, I always write down the steps I took toward achieving my goals and the progress—personal or professional—I made each day.
The Ideas Just Flow
My final question every night is about what ideas I came up with that day. Somehow, going through the above-described process gets me clear enough to remember ideas I may have thought during the day or jotted down on pieces of paper I would probably lose. Now they’re in a place where I can easily see which I want to pursue.
This is my last question because I never feel more alive than when I’m brainstorming ideas, whether it’s for new books, business ideas, or personal projects. And, psychologically speaking, this makes sense. “Dopamine is triggered whenever you achieve something and brainstorming new ideas gives you a sense that anything is possible,” Lichtman explains. “The combination floods your brain with feel-good chemicals.”
Feel-good chemicals, new ideas, and progression toward getting what you want? I say grab the pen and go get it.
