Awareness is Key To Understanding: Stellareddy.com

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Due to the severe gaslighting done to me by my Bullies, Kory & Allison Read, I have had to become more self-aware in order to combat the effects.

I had to become so confident in my own Story that no one could ever cause me to doubt myself ever again.

Self-awareness is really just about being aware and confident of who you are. It can relate to knowing your own values, beliefs, personal preferences and tendencies.

I read so many documents where Kory Read spent so much time trying to erase me as a individual. His words were total invalidation of me as a person with memories, feelings and opinions of her own. I wasn’t allowed to have those, I was just not allowed to be. 

Every word I said and wrote was taken by Kory & Allison Read and was invalidated. It as negated and picked apart and twisted by his own personal perceptions. I was not allowed to have my own, ever. You can see all this, very clearly.

Invalidation is a form of relational trauma which, over time, harms the brain and nervous system, and also results in the disintegration of any healthy bonds of connection, and dissolution of trust in others. Healing requires the slow, ongoing work of diligent growth in character, self-awareness, and love. I am working on all that these days and it does help!

Invalidation, then, is the rejection or dismissal of a person’s thoughts, feelings, emotions, and behaviours as being valid and understandable. Invalidation can cause significant damage or upset to a person’s psychological health and well-being.

Every word ever written by Kory & Allison Read was Invalidating of me, Stella Reddy. These actions of theirs caused severe psychological damage to me. You can see why once you read their words, as written within this site below.

I came to accept that Kory & Allison Read are allowed their opinions, they are not entitled to gaslight their narratives onto others.

They want to believe I was a racist and discriminatory towards them? They can think what they want, they don’t have the authority to push it on others, especially without any evidence of it! 

They want to hate me? Go ahead, just don’t push your hatred of me onto others. 

People can think and believe what they wish, when it comes to trying to FORCE others into believing them, is when it becomes a problem. Stellareddy.com and the other domains, were all about trying to force you to believing them and that was the problem. They write as anonymous people, hiding their identities, out of fear as they know what they do is wrong.

IF their actions with stellareddy.com wasn’t wrong, why is it now gone, especially after renewing it? 

The Overall Takeaway

Validation doesn’t mean you lie or agree with another person, but to accept someone’s experience as truthful for them. Surround yourself with people who support this, and who are kind, encouraging, and validating.

Equally as important is being in a compassionate relationship with yourself. Remind yourself of your inherent worth-that you are enough and that you matter, regardless of what others think or say about you. When you truly know this, it can be very powerful.

You will find things like this there! 
# 13 – Stella Reddy 4th Website – Daily Blog September 23 thru 25, 2019 ( Page 3 )
“ They have basically disappeared from Facebook, and other social media. They even made their children’s
stuff basically disappear from online, which I agree with anyway. Yes, I admit to looking, as I want to catch
anything noted about me, but they have disappeared ”
So let’s clarify. Stella Reddy claims “ I want to catch anything noted about me, ”
This statement is so grossly exaggerated and an outright lie that it again goes to show how Stella Reddy will just make
up false propaganda to try and prove and justify her threating and stalking behaviour.
This is the same type of racist, arrogant and narcissist behaviour that we have all seen from her in past, when she
deliberately tried to lie to the SJTO/HRTO to try and get what she was after. It has all been noted in the documents,
with evidence and placed in the SJTO/HRTO file.
 The time Stella Reddy lied and quote deliberate inaccurate and false city bi-laws about BBQ’s in apartment
buildings even after being given a print out of the city bi-laws from Kory Read.
 The time Stella Reddy lied and told the SJTO/HRTO that our family were THE ONLY tenants with a BBQ in
the building, when in fact videos and pictures showed there were 3 other tenants and Stella Reddy’s own
sister Cindy Jones all had BBQ’s at the same time in the building.
 The time Stella Reddy told the SJTO/HRTO that she was trying to get rid of all BBQ’S from the building, but
still let her sister Cindy Jones move into the building with her BBQ, AFTER Stella Reddy made other tenants
remove and throw out their own BBQ’s from their balcony’s with her phoney city bi-laws.
 The time back in 2018 when Stella Reddy tried to deceived the SJTO/HRTO by stating that our family never
handed in a form requesting parking for our new car 2018 Qash Qai, when in fact our family supplied a video
that proved otherwise.
 The time Stella Reddy falsely claimed to the SJTO/HRTO that the front door of the building had a distinctive
buzzard sound when using keyless entry vs. being buzzed in by a tenant. Again our family supplied a video
that showed again Stella Reddy was deliberately lying.
 The time Stella Reddy claimed to the SJTO/HRTO that she was not the Property Manager, but just a simple
Superintendent, despite her own paperwork showing she called herself a Property Manager.
 The time Stella Reddy denied sharing video of our family from the STAFF ONLY SURVEILLANCE SYSTEM in
the building with her sister Cindy Jones, a tenant down the hall from her.
Think about this…
If Stella Reddy is willing to lie to the SJTO/HRTO over a simple thing like just being called a Property Manager vs. a
Superintendent. What isn’t Stella Reddy willing to lie about to the SJTO/HRTO?
The issue of Property Manager vs. Superintendent is such an insignificant issue, yet Stella Reddy HAD TO TRY and
lie and convince the SJTO/HRTO that she was not a Property Manager. FOR NO REASON! This act of lying by Stella
Reddy alone, says a lot about Stella Reddy and what she is capable of doing to make her look like the poor innocent
victim in all of this.
So, this statement by Stella Reddy about stalking our children, while looking for post about her on their social media
accounts is so ridicules and just another great example of Stella Reddy trying to play the SJTO/HRTO for a bunch
fools and idiots.
At no time have our children EVER posted anything or referenced about the LTB, SJTO, HRTO, Divisional Court,
Court of Appeals or any individual involved with this whole situation on their social media accounts, let alone anything
about this pitiful individual Stella Reddy.
Our family is confused as to why Stella Reddy would say such a thing?
Is it because our children are bi-racial ( Black & White ) that Stella Reddy makes these false and misleading
statements about our children? Is Stella Reddy now trying to portray them as ANGRY BLACK CHILDREN like their
ANGRY BLACK WOMAN mom?
It appears that Stella Reddy loves to label Black People as angry, why?
Because you’re racist member Kevin Lundy allowed Stella Reddy to portray Allison Read as a stereotypical Angry
Black Woman at the LTB hearing without Stella Reddy ever having to produce a single piece of evidence to support
her racist arguments.
So, now Stella Reddy thinks that she can get away with labelling our children as Angry Black Children, who are shit
disturbers and are actively involved in all of this foolishness, by implying to the SJTO/HRTO that they have previously
post things about her on their social media accounts. Again without ever offering a single piece of evidence to back-up
her implied bigotry comment about or children.
You see Stella Reddy got away with this stereotypical racist Angry Black Woman tactic at the LTB hearing with Allison
Read, and her behaviour was not corrected by your racist member Kevin Lundy. So being who Stella Reddy is, she
now thinks she can again escalate this new racist lie to now included our children under the same Angry Black Person
persona.
Stella Reddy is so obsessed with our children, and so obsessed with them being punished. That she placed their
names and photo on her website, so any random search of their names, which are unique and one of a kind names,
will be pulled up will all of Stella Reddy’s negative comments from her websites about our family, with pictures of them
in her attempt to embarrass and punish them.
# 14 – Kniighetti and Eexii Google Search Result – October 5, 2019
# 15 – Stella Reddy Websites – Kniighetti And Eexii Read Names
Stella Reddy makes this exaggeration and outright lie claiming that she was trying to use our children’s social media
accounts to see if THEY were posting about HER on THEIR accounts.
Stella Reddy is obsessed with our children, as she makes references about them in her emails and websites, along
with pictures, despite them being 9 and 15 at the time and them NEVER having any interaction with her.
And still to this day Stella Reddy continues to make references to them in her website, emails and stalk them on social
media even after we moved out from the building to get our kids away from her and her husband Russell Reddy who
have very unnatural and unhealthy stalking obsessions.
Let us remember that our family finally moved out when it was exposed that Stella Reddy and Russell Reddy were
video recording our family from around the building, and that they were sharing it with other tenants.
This unhealthy behaviour scared our children to the point where they would not travel around the building alone. Our
daughter would wait outside the building for ½ hour until I ( Kory Read ) got home from picking up her brother Eexii
from school, because she was scared she would run into Stella Reddy or Russell Reddy in the elevator, hallway or
stairwells.
Their admitted unnatural and disturbing stalking behaviour of our family and children was the turning point for our
family. We no longer felt safe and the children were trapped in their own home as they would not leave it without one
us ( their parents ) being present to accompanying them to the park or by a friend’s house.
So there is absolutely no justification for Stella Reddy’s to be using or viewing our children’s social media accounts!
What was really happening with Stella Reddy and our children’s social media accounts was her and her husband
Russell Reddy were continuing to try and stalk and monitor our family through social media, period!
You see, now that we have moved out and left the building. Stella Reddy and her husband Russell Reddy can no
longer monitor and stalk our family’s movements, spy on our guest and take pictures of our car from their 4th floor
balcony for her website.
They can no longer use the building the STAFF ONLY SECURITY SURVEILLANCE SYSTEM that Luigi Liscio and
Anthony Liscio allowed her to use to record and share videos of our family from around the building with Stella
Reddy’s sister Cindy Jones who is a tenant down the hall.
Stella Reddy without fear, openly admits on her blog that if our family was to return to 859 Kennedy Road at
ANY POINT IN TIME from this day forward to visit our friends in unit # 402 which is right next door to unit # 401 –
Stella Reddy and her husband Russell Reddy unit. Stella Reddy will have to “ teach them ( us ) some of her
justice ”
And yet Stella Reddy wants the SJTO/HRTO to believe on October 3, 2019 at 08:20 am that she is so fearful of
“ physical retribution ” from our family?
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# 16 – Stella Reddy Email – October 3, 2019
“ As the applicants defied the CAD sent May 31, 2019 with these frivolous submissions, On Sept 25, and
Oct 2, 2019 , I expect a decision on Rule A7 and A8 as mentioned there, to be determined at the earliest
opportunity by your office. Any further delays will only lead to more abusive treatment from the applicants
towards all involved, especially myself. Since they vacated the building I have been less fearful, but with the
actions and language coming from the applicant in the recent forms, I am getting fearful once again of
physical retribution ”
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
This newest email by Stella Reddy is absolutely remarkable and just another great example of Stella Reddy playing
the fearful victim despite never producing ANYTHING from our family that could even remotely be interrupted as being
even vaguely threating or intending to harm her or her family. NOTHING!!!
The below is well document in the paper work with evidence that is filed with the SJTO/HRTO on how…
 Stella Reddy had NO FEAR at the time…
when she has made her false accusations that she knows I beat my
wife Allison Read on numerous occasions in her emails and on her
websites.
 Stella Reddy had NO FEAR at the time…
when she has made her numerous threats of physical violence and
harm against our family and children in her emails and on her
website.
 Stella Reddy had NO FEAR at the time…
when she has threaten retaliation against our children and hopes
they are punished by the SJTO/HRTO in her emails and on her
websites.
 Stella Reddy had NO FEAR at the time…
when she was sitting on her 4th floor balcony laughing, talking
excessively loud and recording our family on her phone for hours
upon end while we moved out of the building.
 Stella Reddy had NO FEAR at the time…
when she was telling her friends and family how she was going to sit
in the lobby, pointing and laughing while watching our family move
out on Facebook.
 Stella Reddy had NO FEAR at the time…
when she called out to Kory Read from her 4th floor balcony when he
was leaving the building, trying to get his attention and to provoke a
response while she tried to secretly recorded him on her phone.
 Stella Reddy had NO FEAR at the time…
when she threw a lite cigarette at Kory Read when he was leaving
the building and then she tried to run into her apartment before he
could catch/see her.
 Stella Reddy had NO FEAR at the time…
when she came to the Divisional Court and was sitting in the
courtroom, laughing and giggling with her sister Cindy Jones and her
husband Russell Reddy during our family’s Appeal hearing.
 Stella Reddy had NO FEAR at the time…
when her and Luigi Liscio and Anthony Liscio posted the Divisional
Court Decision in the locked Community Board in the lobby of the
building in their attempts to trying to embarrass and humiliate our
family with other tenants.
 Stella Reddy had NO FEAR at the time…
when posting on her website last week, another threat of physical
violence against our family “ I’ll wait till they come back here
again.. taking matters in my own hands with Kory & Allison Read
and teach them some of my justice. ”
 Stella Reddy had NO FEAR at the time…
when ( we suspect ) she dropped a stone off her 4th floor balcony
during the night and hit the hood of our brand new 2018 Qash Qui
that left a dent.
This explains why Stella Reddy refused to give our family parking around back of the building. Instead she would
make us park upfront in visitor parking, under her 4th floor balcony so she could vandalize our car.
 Stella Reddy had NO FEAR at the time…
when she used Allison Read as a prop at the LTB public hearing to
prove that she was not racist.
 Stella Reddy had NO FEAR at the time…
when she proudly compared Allison Read’s “ dark ” complexation
during a SJTO/LTB public hearing to another individual in her family
to prove she was not racist.
 Stella Reddy had NO FEAR at the time…
when she called our children the racist slur “ Mulato ” outside a
public restaurant and at the SJTO/LTB public hearing.
 Stella Reddy had NO FEAR at the time…
when she proudly uses the slur and derogatory term “ Newfie ”
numerous times during a SJTO/LTB public hearing and in her emails,
social media and on her website.
 Stella Reddy had NO FEAR at the time…
when she threatens our family with civil lawsuits.
 Stella Reddy had NO FEAR at the time…
when she threatened physical violence against Kory Read to the
SJTO/HRTO about go to prison if they do not “ DO SOMETHING
ABOUT THIS ASS OR I WILL, PRISON OR NOT. ”
 Stella Reddy had NO FEAR at the time…
when she created an unauthorized blog under Kory Read’s identity,
making deliberate false and vindictive statements on his behalf.
 Stella Reddy had NO FEAR at the time…
when she was posting pictures of our children and our car on her
website, telling potbelly landlords not to rent to our family, in her
attempt to to make our family homeless.
And the list can go on and on, as there is no shortage of Stella Reddy’s NO FEAR moments. It is all document with
evidence in the SJTO/HRTO file.
And yet, Stella Reddy can not find one piece of material/evidence that our family has ever threatened or even implied
any harm to her and her family. Despite all the prejudice things she said and done to our family over the years.
The funniest part of all this is that Stella Reddy told the SJTO/HRTO that she needed to have a Summary Hearing via
phone because she was so fearful of our family, and the SJTO/HRTO conveniently bought right into it.
You gave Stella Reddy what she wanted without any proof ever being offered by her to justify her request.
And now Stella Reddy again wants something and as previous patterns and habits go with Stella Reddy. She is going
to try her luck again with the SJTO/HRTO and her – play the pity card, and the I’m so scared routine to get what she
wants.
Stella Reddy figures she suckered the SJTO/HRTO into believing it once, she can do it twice!
But do Stella Reddy’s fabricated claims of fear of our family really warrant her scared pity story? NO!
It appears more like that Stella Reddy loves the idea of trying to antagonizing our family, the whole time looking for a
response.
People who are legitimately scared of people don’t go out of their way to..
– kick the hornet’s nest,
– poke the bear, or
– wake up the sleeping giant.
But here is scared little Stella Reddy doing all of the above, and then putting on a big show about how she is so
frightened of our family and the retribution that we MIGHT do to her based on what? ABSOLUETY NOTHING!!!
What Stella Reddy is truly afraid of is having to go to trial or having a hearing where she has to appear in person
( hence her request for a Summary Hearing via phone ).
Where Stella Reddy would have to then explain everything in person, having to try and explain away all of her
discriminatory behaviour, all of her racist remarks and actions and the endless amounts of lies she got caught telling to
the SJTO/HRTO and the world.
Stella Reddy’s biggest fear is appearing in person, because she can not hide behind her computer monitor and ignore
the facts. She can’t just sit back and take her time while in person trying to think of excuses until she gets one that
she likes. Stella Reddy is a horrible liar, and even worse when trying to lie on the fly.
This is what Stella Reddy is really afraid of…
You see Stella Reddy loves to deliberate lie and use exaggerations based on absolutely NOTHING in her attempt to
embellish and portray our family as a group of crazy lunatics that are unpredictable, unstable and violent.
But this is not the end of Stella Reddy and her unlawful and fearless behaviour. Stella Reddy has now use Kory
Read’s identity again, this time to try and illegally obtain a 2nd set of mailbox keys to our families mailbox on St. Clair
Avenue.
Kory Read received an email from Canada Post on September 26, 2019 at 5:01 pm stating;
How can I be aware? 
3 ways to become self-aware
  1. Assess your self-talk. The first step in self-awareness is to listen to yourself. …
  2. Use your senses. Your senses (sight and sound, in particular) can provide you with huge insights into your own and other people’s feelings, and situations in general. …
  3. Tune into your feelings.

This can help if:

  • you want to know more about yourself
  • you want to develop good self-esteem
  • you don’t understand other people’s reactions to stuff that you’re doing.

Why does self-awareness matter?

Self-awareness is really just about being aware and confident of who you are. It can relate to knowing your own values, beliefs, personal preferences and tendencies.

You know how famous people always say, ‘Stay true to yourself’? This is really important advice, but it’s not easy to stay true to yourself if you don’t know who you are. By becoming self-aware and understanding your strengths and limitations, you open up opportunities that just aren’t available otherwise. You’re also able to have more honest and genuine relationships because the people that you’re attracted to will be attracted to you for who you actually are.

3 ways to become self-aware

1. Assess your self-talk

The first step in self-awareness is to listen to yourself. What’s going on in your mind? Is it a series of negative thoughts that make you feel pretty crappy? Or are you always looking on the bright side?

In practice: Take a couple of minutes each day to sit in silence and listen to the tone of your inner voice. One way of getting your inner voice going is to stand in front of a mirror and hear what you’re saying to yourself about how you look. It might even help to write down your thoughts so that you can get a better idea of how positive or negative they are.

2. Use your senses

Your senses (sight and sound, in particular) can provide you with huge insights into your own and other people’s feelings, and situations in general. But these senses are often viewed through the filter of our self-talk. For example, a frown doesn’t always mean that someone’s angry, and a groan doesn’t necessarily mean that the person you’re talking with is bored, despite what your inner voice might be saying.

In practice: The next time you feel that someone is judging you, or has made you feel bad about yourself, take a step back and write down why you think this. Ask yourself, ‘Could I have interpreted what was said/done differently?’ You might find that your interpretation was clouded by your own negative thoughts.

3. Tune into your feelings

This can be hard if you’re not the kind of person who likes to think too deeply about your feelings. Your feelings are spontaneous and emotional responses to the things you experience. Like your senses, they give you good information about what’s going on around you, should you choose to tune into them.

There are some physical signs that you can look for that might help you to ‘read’ your feelings. They include:

  • A warm feeling in your face might mean you’re embarrassed.
  • A feeling of ‘butterflies’ in your tummy can mean you’re nervous.
  • Clenching your teeth might mean you’re angry.

In practice: Be aware of physical signs that might indicate how you’re feeling. By engaging with how you’re feeling, you can get better insights into what you like, what makes you feel uncomfortable and what makes you angry.

Invalidation Effects

Psychological invalidation or emotional invalidation causes serious psychological damage.

Not only does emotional invalidation can it create emotional distance, conflict, violence, and disruption in relationships, but the recipient of emotional invalidation can feel alienated, confused, inferior, worthless, and problematic.

Validation means acknowledging, accepting, and understanding another’s feelings and thoughts and that you support them in their perspective.

It allows another person’s internal experience to exist without having to judge it or brush it under the carpet. For example, if a child is afraid of the ocean, an invalidating parent might say, “Don’t be silly, the ocean is nothing to be afraid of.”

A validating thing to say instead would be, “I hear that you are feeling scared. Can you tell me what makes you afraid of the ocean?”

If you have a habit of invalidating yourself, you can start by practicing simple affirmations that accept your feelings and experiences. Examples of these include:

“My feelings are valid, and they matter.”

“I respect and honor my feelings.”

“I accept my feelings as they are and acknowledge that they are not wrong.”

What to Do About It

Emotions serve an important purpose and will almost always point to something that needs to be acknowledged.

They are not right or wrong-they are a reflection of your inner experience. If you are the recipient of emotional invalidation, know that you are not unreasonable or unstable-your thoughts and emotions are valid because they are real.

If someone is being non-validating to you, it is understandable that you defend yourself and increase your efforts to be understood.

Being the recipient of emotional invalidation can trigger a fight-or-flight response that can either make you act aggressively or defensively. However, this may only establish conflict and division and play into the perpetrator’s plan of distracting you from the real issue at hand.

Instead of getting angry or defending yourself against emotional invalidation, try not to accept the invalidation. Let them know calmly using “I” statements how you feel, and be prepared to end the conversation if they do not hear you or want to hear you. Let them know that you will discuss the matter with them when you feel safe to do so. Be neutral and assertive and set clear boundaries with them.

If this person continues to pursue emotional invalidation, invalidate your feelings, and resist change, it may be wise to take inventory of the relationship and think about whether or not it is worth your time and investment.

Therapy is an effective way of dealing with the intense emotions of emotional invalidation and can help you reclaim your self-confidence and assertiveness emotionally.

A licensed therapist can also help you cope, offer support, and create a safe space for you to share how you feel without judgment.

 

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