A Bullies Actions Are the Problem, NOT your Reactions to Them!
Sorry, I’ve been a bit distracted this week. Broke my ankle last weekend and it’s been a bit hard to sit at my computer for too long. I am mending though! I am off to see the specialist this afternoon, they think I might need surgery but we will see. My legs are a mess… lol Nothing I can’t deal with!
I haven’t been thinking too much about the smear campaign and my bullies these days, too many other pressing concerns, but I keep coming back to all I have learned and I keep coming back to this point. As long as I know the truth, it is all that matters.
I have spent so long being shamed and ridiculed for defending myself against their actions by these tenant bullies when that was never the problem. No reaction would be needed, from anyone, if these Bullies had allowed entry, no matter how often it was asked for or the reason. The Residential Tenancy Act was very clear on rules of entry and it clearly outlined a tenant’s responsibilities, which they clearly broke with their own words. All they had to do as tenants were follow the tenancy rules.
These Tenant Bullies went into this situation filled with resentment for not being able to control who entered the apartment and when. Of course, we would all love to dictate when someone could come to fix something, but these contractors don’t work for you. You can ask, but they don’t need to accommodate you. The lack of faith and trust in the staff and contractors they express with their comments that they were afraid of things going missing, don’t hold water. It isn’t a reason to refuse, especially with cameras in the hallway. They made excuses.
They learned what they did was wrong and against the rules and rather than be mature adults and accept responsibility for their own actions, they tried to place it on me for not allowing them control. It became about how I did my job, not about how they broke the rules. Everything became about Stella Reddy and what she is doing, not what they did that got them in trouble in the first place.
That is what is so convoluted about this Smear Campaign. I did see some of this, but I wasn’t strong enough to fight it like I am now. The Effects of gaslighting are terrible on your psyche. I had to become so confident in my own truth of this situation before I could say unequivocally that this is what it is. I have become confident these days, as I have educated myself. I know now and that is good enough for me.
I had so many people around me try to keep me down, and quiet, out of their own fear of these Tenant Bullies turning on them and making a post online about them, or a domain in their personal name like they did me and others. I am glad I am away from all those people.
If someone else got attacked by these Tenant Bullies for supporting me, that is all on the Tenant Bullies, not me. Just like another blogger was attacked on stellareddy.com, the evidence is there. They did that, not anyone else.
No one forced Toxic Tenant Bullies to make and post these websites, did they?
I have learned that one of the red flags of pathological narcissism is that you will never have so many misunderstandings with someone in your whole life. The misunderstandings that these tenant Bullies had been in their own heads, thinking everyone was in “cahoots” against them, thinking I was being personal over their marriage, their family, and their possessions, when I could care less. Making so many assumptions about my actions and words. It is very convoluted.
I am well on my way to recovery and I am so much stronger in mind these days. I have come to see how much I have actually endured in my lifetime and survived and thrived, and I know I can thrive once again. I am very grateful for what I have, and for whom I have in my life. I get so much support and it has helped me see I deserve to be happy and content.